I'll love you forever...

"...The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years old, and he ran all around the house. He pulled all the books off the shelves. He pulled all the food out of the refrigerator and he took his mother's watch and flushed it down the toilet. Sometimes his mother would say, "this kid is driving me CRAZY!"

But at night time, when that two-year-old was quiet, she opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor, looked up over the side of his bed; and if he was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be..."

by Robert Munsch

I love you little bug. I love you more than I could ever articulate into words. Sometimes my heart aches from the unconditional feelings I have for you.

No matter what, I want you to live a life of joy. A life that was given to you not because of mommy and daddy but because of our sweet Lord and his purpose for you.

Hold tight to your courage and remember that you are braver than you know, more compassionate than you may feel and worth more than anyone may say.

I love you. Daddy loves you. Your grandmas love you. Your grandpas love you. Your aunts and uncles love you. Your cousins love you. Your baby friends love you. But most of all, God love you.

I pray you never doubt this or underestimate the power of unconditional love. 

"Life is semisweet, for sure" (Gratitude + Being a Momma)

The other day, I woke up around 5:30am and as I lay in bed, I scrolled through my Instagram feed to help pull my sleepy eyes open. As I scrolled, I saw a photo of a beautiful little boy with big red curls and life exuding from his sweet little smile. Underneath his photo stated that the unthinkable had happened to him and prayers are much needed for his family. My heart stopped.

As I read about his story on Alissa Circle's blog, I immediately started sobbing in bed with what felt like a stab to my chest-where it hurts most. I couldn't fathom how the family of this 3 1/2 year old boy must feel at that moment and a wave of emotions covered me as I wanted to hold and squeeze my son for as long as I can-to hold onto his precious tiny body that won't ever be this small again.

I couldn't imagine losing a child. I prayed. I prayed for comfort and peace for Ryan's family as well as gratitude and thanksgiving for the time I have been given with my son. I want to be grateful every. single. day. for my son, my husband and my family and friends because truth is, the Lord may have a different plan and our loved ones may not be with us for as long as we desire.

Yesterday, I went outside for a bit of fresh air and sunlight and finished reading the book Ketchup is a Vegetable. I came across such enriching words and couldn't have said it better myself when it comes to being a little one's momma...

"Every moment counts.

Every child that is brought into this world is a miracle and gift from God...Every child that is born fills me full of hope. Hope that this world isn't the horrible place depicted on the evening news. Hope that if something so perfect can even exist, then there is good to be found in the world.

Every child is another opportunity for us to get things right, to raise our children with a respect for God and people and with a zest for life. Every day brings a new opportunity to love our children, to laugh with them, cry with them, and watch them grow. Every day with our children is an opportunity for us to learn from them, to hopefully replicate their easy acceptance of others and unconditional love for life. Every day there is an opportunity to let God use your children to sand off your own rough edges, making you more like them and ultimately more like Him.

It can be difficult to keep these things in perspective.

Life is semisweet, for sure. There is bitterness there, like medicine mixed in chocolate syrup, and it must be swallowed whole along with the moments that flood your heart with pure joy. We can laugh, or we can cry. The choice is yours. But if I had my time again-I'd do it all the same."

-Robin O'Bryant
Ketchup is a Vegetable and Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves

Hold your babies tight. Be thankful and love big-so big that regret doesn't follow because every moment counts and each day is not guaranteed.

Please keep the family of Ryan Cruz Saldana in your prayers and learn how you can help here.
#RedBalloonsForRyan

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted

    and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

Psalm 34:18

Hello Monday. A TINY Peek into the Schedule of a Stay At Home Mommy and Small Biz Owner.

It's been a long day so far and the afternoon just arrived. Waking up at 4:50 this morning to drag myself out of bed and like a zombie to the coffee machine to get my morning boost started. Then, to the cabinet to take my daily thyroid medication and straight to the kitchen table where I plopped myself down to begin prayer and devotion through the Sermon on the Mount. 

Once 5:30 rolled around, I headed to the craft room to get the orders finished and packaged up that need to go out today (thank God I scheduled my pickup last night since we are temporarily down to one car as of yesterday). As I worked on the crowns and veil, I also replied to several emails as I tried to multi-task. I had about 10 email conversations going at once and tried to get them organized so I didn't get any information and custom listings mixed up.

I completely finished one order and right about 7:30 heard little man playing in his room. Bug is up! I scramble to his room and after smothering him in morning smooches, I smelled something awful and sure enough, a dirty diaper...and not just any dirty diaper...one that oozed out onto his pants and onto his shirt (hello motherhood). To the shower we went!

Afterwards, little bug and I prayed (his fav. new word-AMEN) and ate cereal together.

Between starting the laundry and doing the dishes, I tried to go back and forth to the craft room to get increments of as much packaging done as I can (mail man will be here soon).

I took a small break to get some fresh air with the little one and went outside to push him around on his trike and catch some indian bugs.

About a half hour later, it was time to go back and do some more packaging, send photos to a customer and answer a few more emails. All the while, pushing up the frozen yogurt on a stick every 2 mins for Levi and coloring on random pieces of paper with him.

For lunch, lasagna it was...not only for Levi's tummy but also for the floor. Clean up that mess. Check.

Time to play cards with little man and work on the laundry some more.

Afterwards...it's about 12:30 at this time, go and finish packaging the orders and print shipping labels.

Come back and put the little man down for a nap as I sing "Jesus Love Me"-his going to bed song.

Breathe.

Husband is still at work. Baby is sleeping and the house is quiet. Emails still have to be sent. Several other orders have to be worked on. Photos need to be sent to customers. Another Mail Pickup has to be scheduled. Text messages need responses and lunch needs to be eaten.

But right now, relaxation takes priority...it will all get done in it's own time. 

It's OK to take a break, even if it's for a moment. Be good to yourself.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." 

Matthew 11:28

What do you do to relax and how often do you allow yourself a break amidst a busy schedule?

St. Patty's-An ordinary day + some green

Happy St. Patrick's Day my friends!

I don't really celebrate this holiday too much other than remembering to wear green so I don't get pinched out in public-would people really do that to a stranger though? Just in case, I'm covered.

This morning, I went and visited my dear friend Tara of Laila's Charming Pieces to talk shop and the latest mommy ventures while our toddlers teased and instigated one another around the house. I cherish our friendship.

While chatting, we shared our experiences with trying to grow and cultivate a business which is something I fell in love with and enjoy learning from each day. Once you find your passion, possibilities are seemingly endless if your heart is in the right place. It's nice to share a similar excitement and experiences with someone else.

Afterwards, I stopped by a couple supply stores and came home to carry a sleeping baby love to his bed for a nap. Meanwhile, I started on my custom floral crown orders-of which, I have several. Hello wedding season!

Chores will be started soon and I'm thinking chicken fajitas for dinner once the husband comes home from work.

It's just another ordinary sunny day (with some added wind advisories)...
Nothin' fancy.

Ring from Paint The Town Me

What are you up to on this fine "green" day?

Levi Turns 2-A Balloon & Adventure Themed Birthday

It's been about 2 weeks now and I am finally getting around to blogging my baby love's birthday party. Whew!

My little man turned 2 at the beginning of the month (read his "birthday letter"). Where did the time go?! This year, we hosted his birthday party in our very own home. Last year, we hosted it at our dear friend's house because at the time, our little home wouldn't fit all of the guests. Since we've moved into our new place, (which is double the size), we were so excited to have all of our family and friend's over to celebrate this occasion. Mind you though, there were about 40 guests and we quickly learned...our home was still lacking the space we needed but it was so good to see everyone we loved under one roof. :)

It was a very cold day with a storm coming in and snow flurries hitting the ground. Hello December weather! With everyone mingling in the kitchen and living room, the kids ran a muck with paper yo-yos in hand and small balloons static clinging to their heads. It was so funny!

For decor, I wanted to keep it simple this year since we had just moved in only a few weeks ago. Levi is OBSESSED with balloons so I decided on a balloon theme with a bit of "adventure" thrown in. Within just a couple of days, I put everything together with the help of my wonderful husband. We blew up balloons to create little floating hot air balloons and made a cake topper and a few garland strands with several mini balloons. I also cut out cloud shapes to hang on 2 of the walls (hard to see in the photos) and used several decor pieces that I already had from previous parties or around the house.

For food, we went with a "picnic theme" and had croissant sandwiches, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, mac n' cheese, watermelon, grapes, potato salad, cole slaw and flavored sodas along with lemonade. I felt like a kid and that was just fine with me. :)

As we all sang Happy Birthday to Levi, he had the BIGGEST smile as he looked around and admired the attention. He loved every minute of it and as soon as we finished, he clapped. That was my favorite moment of the day.

Here is a little peek into Levi's 2nd birthday party.

My sweet baby bug.

My adorable niece,

That SMILE!

Photo taken by GPMcCash ("G Pa")

Photo taken by GPMcCash ("G Pa")

So thankful for my family-my heart.

I love you little man and I am so proud to be your mommy. Forever my baby you'll be.

A Birthday Letter to My Dearest

Two years ago today, my husband and I were given the very best blessing we could have ever prayed for. On December 2, 2011 at 11:01 am, we welcomed a little 6lb 11oz baby boy into this world. That sweet bundle of love has changed our lives forever.

Before I became a mother, I thought I knew what love was, I thought I learned to be selfless and I thought I knew what made me happy. 

Dearest Levi, 

When my eyes first met yours, my heart became bigger, my smile wider, my hugs tighter and my tears heavier. You have brought so much joy to my life and I thank Jesus every day for you, including every night as you fall asleep as daddy and I sing "Jesus Loves You".

Although I get tired and worn out much sooner than you do, I am thankful for your endless creativity and bounds of energy. If only I could bottle up just a bit of your endurance and fearlessness, we could soar to the moon and back. 

My hope for you is that you will follow the path that the Lord has set for you, you won't let any fears overcome your purpose, you will love big and you will hold tight to your creative imagination. You are so incredibly smart little one. You will do amazing things!

It has been 2 years of being a mommy to you and I couldn't imagine life without you. You have taught me so much more than I could have ever dreamed and you helped make me a better person. I am eternally grateful.

You will forever be my baby.

I love you so SO much!!

Happy birthday bug!!

Love, 

Mommy

P.S. When you wake up from your nap in a few minutes we will be going to pick out a fish for your birthday gift. You are infatuated with them and today, you will have your very own "fishy". <3

Emotional New Beginnings

As the leaves change this fall season, so brings a new transition to my little family. A couple weeks ago, we closed escrow and received keys to our new and first home that we can call ours. After 3 years of living in a home that we have been renting, it was time to start a new chapter in our lives.

We are so thankful to have lived in our little home for the time that we did and have so many memories tied to that house on Poplar street. From moving in once my husband and I said "I Do," to bringing our little man home to his first bedroom, it housed a lot of important "firsts" for us.

The last day of packing and moving, I went into the empty blue room where 2 years ago, my husband was putting together Levi's crib as I supervised with a large pregnant belly-the room that housed many of Levi's coos, giggles, tears and smiles. I laid on that bare carpet with my baby boy by my side and stared up into the ceiling. As Levi took his last nap in the room we first brought him home to, I cried.

I couldn't help but feel like I was losing something. As I was packing up my closet, cleaning the bathrooms and walking through the house with bare walls, I was reminded of all the great moments and all the blessings we have been given.

As I was driving away and into the new town we now call home, I cried some more. I felt like I was leaving family and leaving a piece of myself some place else. Truth is, this move was a lot harder than I ever thought it would be (even if we were moving only a half hour away). I wasn't prepared for the rush of emotions that overwhelmed me but with new beginnings come new memories and I'm so excited! 

As we are settling into our new home, I am loving it more and more as the days pass. I am happy where we are and can't wait to see what's in store for us! We have experienced joy even amongst the stresses of moving. Although the workload seems intolerable at times, there is light at the end of the tunnel and it's within reach. This house is turning into a home-our home-each and every day.

As of now, we are just about done organizing. It's really coming down to finishing up with paint and decor-which I am having a really hard time making decisions on...especially since we are having family over for Thanksgiving and I want the house to at least be "decent" and still feel home-y. It's comin' along.

I will be updating some of the home projects soon but until then, have a beautiful Thanksgiving! 

What are your plans for the holiday?

Thoughtful Thursday + A Discount Code!!!!

 Chiffon shirt + Skinny Jeans: Forever21 Yellow statement necklace: Lindis Delicate Edge Flats + Cross ring: Rue21

A few thoughts from today:

*How in the world do you dress for sum-fall? It's still way too hot out but I want so badly to dress for fall already and break out the richer colors, comfy cardis and ankle boots! Instead, I will go "simple style" today with a statement necklace (which I LOVE) from Lindis Delicate Edge. Love Sparkle Pretty readers get 20% off your order with the code LSPLOVES20!! Go see her pretty shop here!

*So excited for Disneyland in a couple weeks with other mommy friends. I'm totally not a part of the Disney obsessed but I love a reason to get dressed up and since we are dressing as Disney characters, I might as well have fun with it. Turning myself into Pocahontas for the night. It's time for a Pow Wow!

*It's back to square one with house hunting. A few nights ago, we backed out of escrow from the house we put an offer in. Honestly, I'm relieved after finding so many repairs that need to be done during the home inspection. I just don't want to sign a billion more papers!

*I need to take more power naps. Enough said.

*After breaking down at women's bible study today, I thought about the fruits of my labor being put into my sweet, ever growing son. I broke down because while there were several other women with kids playing in the house, my son seemed to be the only one getting on top of tables, banging on tin toys (loudly), eating other peoples food, hitting others with paint rollers and sticking toys in the toilet. After trying to discipline him over and over and still not getting anywhere with soothing his actions, I took him into the other room, closed the door and sobbed as he looked at me with his compassionate eyes. His strong will is overbearing most days and it certainly doesn't make motherhood easy.
As I think about these past (almost) 2 years of being a mom, it's been a struggle but I know that the fruits of my bearing, the results of my call to motherhood won't be all for nothing. I'm learning everyday and will appreciate every moment-even the hard ones. If you are a mother, remember this and cling to this. Raise your child(ren) in the way they should go and let God handle the rest.

What has been on your mind today?

A bed jumping, box climbing, string cheese in carpet-kind of playdate.

Lately, I've had a whirlwind of choas with things to do-especially with this whole buying a house business. It was time for some mommy talk and a play date. 

Here's how it went.

Cracker crumbs. Bed jumping. Outside voices. Kisses. String cheese in carpet. Slide sliding. Box climbing. Tears. Laughter. Movie watching. Blue sunglasses. Gulps from sippies. Sharing and the lack of. Diaper changes. Hugs. Blanket sucking. Silly faces. Big messes. Happy children.

CRAZY. LOVE.

Here's just a teeny-tiny-itty-bitty peek of the afternoon.

It was such a good day to have some mommy time and see our little ones interact with one another. It has been a while since all 3 of them have had a play date but they have been little besties since birth. 

Here are the babes about a year ago. This makes my heart happy. :) Levi looks like a little yoda...LOL

Here's to motherhood and crazy, energetic, curious, loud, beautiful and healthy babies.

Gratitude {A difficult reflection of motherhood + healing wounds}

There is always something to be grateful for but lately, I have been feeling even more thankful than usual. It started with something that Brant Hansen said one day on Air1. He was talking about that article that was just published about children costing a crazy amount of money and how much of a cost "burden" they can be. Brant gave a quote from Justin Guarini about this same topic that actually put tears in my eyes. He said, 

"There was a time when I could have thrown down cash for a house, and had any number of lovers in and out the door. A flashy car and clothes to match. An ego to trump them all.

Now, I rent a home filled with love. I have a wife whom I love and who loves me (me!) and who lifts me up. Children who give me cherubic-lipped kisses before I leave for work and who are the most delicious morsels of joy and peace and prosperity.

I am a pretty wealthy individual. 

And then this, his best line:

I have more riches than I can count. Most of them come in the form of smiles and drool... but they make me feel like a gazillionaire."

When he said this, I felt a little guilty because at times, I feel like I don't appreciate how much of a blessing my son is. Sometimes, I get so overwhelmed with his energizer bunny, bouncing off walls, jumping off tables, throwing things behavior. I felt guilty for the times I've said "I need a break" or "this is so much harder than I ever thought."

He is well, he is alive, he is curious, he is unique and he is unbelievably precious and loved in not only mine and my husband's eyes but the Lord's eyes as well.

I would never change what God has blessed me with and I am SO thankful for the life I've been given-including our little lover-everything about him. Yes, sometimes I may feel as if I "need a break" from the messes of smeared fruit snacks in the carpet, the brief heart attacks from watching my son get on tables to try and jump off and the constant discipline to get him to stop putting random things in the outlets.

This is life and it's filled with lots of kisses until bellies start hurting from laughter, hugs that squeeze tightly, hands that tangle up and "I Love You"s to last a lifetime yet can't ever be said enough. I would never trade any of this for the world and I'm thankful to have reflected due to a couple minutes listening to the radio.

Think this post stops there? Not entirely.

A few days ago, I was also attacked by a few large dogs. I don't really want to get too much into it because I don't want to think about the details but I can honestly find ENORMOUS gratitude in that situation as well. I could have had my son with me, I could have had my face severely wounded or even organs punctured BUT even in that moment, I was being protected.

My side has bite marks, I have a very small gash on my head and a couple deep punctures in my right arm. My arm got the worst of it but my physical wounds are definitely healing quickly with lots of prayers from family and friends. My emotional wounds will certainly take longer though. Today, I saw my neighbors small dog wondering into our yard and my heart stopped. I turned around to walk into the house praying the dog wouldn't follow me and I shut the door as quickly as possible.

Yet through this, I have so much more to be grateful for because I am well and I am able to be at home with my family.

This is what I will dwell on.
Thank you Lord!

What are you thankful for lately?